Speed Racer Moron

So I'm cruising down the highway at the posted speed limit which is about 65 mph. I'm enjoying the nice afternoon, got the windows down, the breeze feels good and helps to balance the warm sun shining generously on my skin. It's just about 4.15 pm and the rush-hour traffic has already started. I'm in the slower lane on the right side of the highway with my fellow motorists who enjoy taking their time to get home like I do, perhaps after their busy days.

All of a sudden, I look in my rear-view mirror and who should I see? None other than Speed Racer Moron who is either hurrying to Nascar or definitely took a wrong left turn and ended up on the interstate.

I continue enjoying my afternoon drive when upon looking in the side mirror, I realize that the moron is right behind trying to give my car a bumper kiss with his Mazda. Now, I have nothing against Mazdas or foreign used cars - in fact, I think they're pretty durable, affordable and quite economic. My problem lies with the fact that the moron must at some point look at his own speedometer and see that I'm already at the speed limit and realize that we're both in the slow, slow lane.

To make things worse, he decides to flash his lights at me. I'm not sure what he wants me to do - probably go faster or get ready for his super, signature, awesome, jumping-car move. Anyhow, I don't really give a rat's ass and keep on driving. Looking back again in the rear-view, I'm shocked when I see the face of the guy twisted in anger. The lane next to me is clearly free and there's not an exit for the next 3 miles. The nerve of some people!

I hate when people drive bumper to bumper especially when the person in front of them is already at or even over the speed limit. I always get the daydream in the back of my head that I'm driving a big semi with a huge steel bumper in the back when suddenly I change gear and slow down and hear the satisfying thud of metal on steel behind me. Aaah...if life were like that sometimes...

I know we're often in a hurry to get somewhere (usually not that important or we should have left earlier) but please don't try to get me to get a possible ticket by going over the speed limit. Especially if I'm in the SLOW lane. Sad to say you will have to wait another day to fulfill your boyish ambitions of cruising I-85 or I-485 at 120 mph.

Next time, I see another speed racer behind me and I'm at the limit, I'll start my Driving Ms. Daisy routine and keep doing what I'm doing to get where I'm going. Speed racer, I'm looking for you next time and I'll be ready...Aarrgh!

Speed Racer Moron