Friday, November 13, 2009

Supersize Me! No, Wait...Make That XXXXL!!

I should probably blame my pet Peeve for this one too. This is high up on my list of social peeves. Now, I'm not one big on buying into most stereotypes but sometimes, the people that fall under these labels tend to do a fantastic job at advertising themselves.

This particular group today has a unique 'urban outiffter' (not the brand) vibe when it comes to dressing. Society likes to say and believe that dressing styles are simply modes of expression. Yet, I think some modes need to be given the silent treatment, made to wear the dunce cap and put to sit in the corner for meaningful reflection. The guilty party I am talking about this time is the urban, hip-hop (or jail-time?) influenced mode of dress. Rather the extreme version of it because nothing's wrong with regular hip-hop dressing as far as I'm concerned.

Let me present a few case exhibits.

The two main items of conflict here are the over-over-over-sized tees and the jeans worn around the knees. After all, what's more appealing than a fresh glimpse of butt crack, plaid underwear and arse in the morning? Or what about that stylish all-white 'man skirt' some people wear and try to parade it as a tee?

This 'honor' of this 'luxury' was once reserved for gang-bangers, jail birds, hip-hop artistes and street ballers. Though, this list still does not in any way venerate the wearing of one's pants this low. I still give it ZERO COOL POINTS. I have noticed, this list has now been extended to include such types as douche bags, confused white boys wanting to be urban, guys who play for the guy team, and even little kids at the daycare.

To the abusers of this trend:
Wearing jeans this way or tees that swallow you up and make everything from your knees up disappear definitely sends certain messages. And they may not always be the ones that you want to send. Unless you're walking in certain areas and have always wanted to see what it feels like to have a Life Swap with a hard-core thug who shows his boxers. Maybe you have dreams about being the next bigger Myspace rapper or you want to be that guy who tries to hand you his demo CD every time you're walking downtown. Or perhaps of trying to run while holding your pants up while still tripping over yourself. Some research might show that this may actually be the number one cause of deaths in these areas - can't run away fast enough!

I think it's unfair for people who do this and buy most of the XXXXL tees to look hip and urban when their size is clearly a M or L at best. What about Big Boi, Heavy T, Slim and Fat Albert? Can they sleep soundly at night knowing that other more deserving people have to walk around bare back because of their silliness? Shame on you, wearer-of-clothes-way-too-big!

It's like a new spot on the Monopoly Board Game or one of those little cards you pick up.  
Are your jeans blatantly sagging? Go straight to jail! 
You've been selected to model on the runway for the new Th'ugh Warnabee Line. We love your long, flowing, white cotton dress!

I mean how can some wearers of these clothes seriously expect to make a run from the trap house (code name: house where drugs are sold/bought. tip: house in community, development, projects that may have many cars always parked there all during the day.)? Or run from the boys in blue (Five-O or 'po po')? As a matter of fact, from other peeps who they may owe money? It's ludicrous I tell you!

This is yet another fault of that ole pet of mine, Peeve. I wish he'd stop using his magical powers and causing other people to do this.

Remember, friends don't let friends sag jeans!


P.S. Lil Wayne has mad skills though! Real talk. And, have you seen these two guys (or guys that look like this) before? Talk about socially confused misfits...

4 spoke already...add your 2¢:

Jill said...

LOL I love seeing all the different colored boxers ... not.
The "long flowing white cotton dress" part made me laugh :D

Anonymous said...

It always amazed me how britches hovering that low seem to defy all laws of gravity ... not to mention laws for public decency ... and comfort ...

bananas. said...

so glad you added that ps. because lil wayne can do no wrong. who cares that his bum is hanging out over his pants and creating a sort of ass muffin top. i don't! haha but i know what you mean. this look is so 5 years ago.

Dave "Loose Cannon" Wills said...

>jill: Makes me laugh all the time I see them too! Lol.

>sja: Including laws for common sense.

>bananas.: Yeah. Weezy is the man. Though I'd prob still tell him to pull his pants up if his bum is exposed. Lol.

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